VooZoo: Paramount's attempt to sell $1 movie clips. Oh, and alluding to terrorism is a perfectly acceptable way to sell clips, I guess.

Paramount, the oldest movie studio here, is willing to sell you video clips of its Very Important movies for $1 a pop, minimum. “VooZoo,” which rhymes with “Hulu,” which rhymes with “piece of shit,” is an online service (right now, a Facebook app and on there.com) that tries to outdo YouTube by charging you for the privilege of keeping the clips.

Apparently, Paramount wants to leverage its awesome library so it can turn around and sell them to you for use on mobile devices. You know, because even though you bought Top Gun on VHS, then on DVD, you still have to pay again to watch clips of it on you cellphone. OK!

What’s stopping someone from using Snapz to record the clips, for free?

I just installed the Facebook app, and it tries so hard to be all wild and in my face. Like, take this line.

No, I don’t have anything “Big,” or “Shocking” to say; I did not plan on running down the street naked, either. Who writes this horseshit?

My absolute Favorite (see, I can capitalize, too!) part is the line at the end of the Come Play With Us heading.

“FanRocket [the company behind this disaster] was founded by CEO, Danny Kastner and has 20 employees based in Hollywood, New York City [wow!], and scattered in secret cells across the US!”

Oh, you mean like al-Qaeda? Cool! You mean, I can hide away in a “secret cell” and work for you guys? High five, let’s do lunch.

Just save your money, and your time, and stay clear of this garbage. And tell your less technologically inclined friends, too.

via Gawker